Day 4: Saying goobye
Today was an eventful day at work. We had a dear colleague leaving us and the farewell was hard on all of us, especially those who worked with him the closest.
It's interesting isn't it how close we all become at work when you spend about 9 hours a day with people who start off as complete strangers and then sometimes can end up as friends and even family.
Here's the thing with handling relationships at work because it is a very very slippery slope all day everyday. One word, one slip, one facial expression can set a completely different tone to a relationship, be it a good tone or a negative one. You must learn to read others and then discover how to deal with them by not losing yourself in the process. To succeed and survive for as long as you possibly can, you must work hard, and above that, know people skills. You must be fluent in people.
Saying goodbye to one of our colleagues, or should I say family member today was hard for all of us and it instantly made some of us think "what if this is me next time?" or "what if this is my best friend?". And then you can't help but wonder are you doing all you can with the people you have. You want to leave a good memory with those you care about. You want to know that when you leave, you're leaving big shoes to fill.
I know we all go to work everyday and just wan to work but what if we try to connect more with another, extend a smile to someone who we're not used to smiling at or to. I know it's an effort, I know going to see other departments and just saying hello can seem like a tedious task but try it once a week... if it's really so hard then once a month.
My boss told me something last week that I genuinely liked and he said or at least I think he said,"We are in the business of changing hearts and minds." Then he went on to say that this is something that an old boss of his used to say too. That belief is to say this is who we are, we want to impact other people's minds and hearts and look beyond the small stuff.
Now easier said than done right? So how does one implement this?
Well I know it's hard to even think of all this if your work environment is absolute crap, pardon my French. If you have a boss form hell and a management team who doesn't know you exist and you're in a foreign place where you're the small fish I can definitely see you'd think that what I'm talking about right now is delusional and maybe even euphoric and you know how I know?
Because I have been there too many times for toooooo long. But eventually God heard my prayers and where I am now allows me to finally focus on growing my professional self and investing in what I do for my organisation and for my clients.
I will get into how to dealing with bad bosses and all the nitty gritty of this but my post today is about saying good as the title states.
At work, as we do in our personal lives, we say goodbye often to people, to situations and to parts of ourselves; parts we love and parts we hate. In the rough corporate world which seems and feels like you'r lying on cold pavement in the bleak midwinter, you are forced to shed the innocent and loving side of you that genuinely cares for others, be them friends or not because as time passes you'll realize that this particular characteristic in you is used against you. You will be pinned for your kindness and targeted for your naive self.
So quickly you must adapt, learn to juggle all sorts of emotions and learn to contain yourself so as to not explode or over do any sort of feelings whatsoever.
You know it takes a while for you to understand how to be nice without being a punching bag and it takes you a while to figure out how to maintain respect between you and others especially your boss without being disrespected or offended in anyway. You learn when to speak up and when to shut up and listen.
It's like going into a boxing ring with no gloves and no protection whatsoever and you just pray your muscles and bones are strong enough to hold you up so as to not get you killed.
So I'll end today's blog with this, goodbyes are hard. They indicate change and unpredictability at most times. But it is inevitable and also essential to becoming epic and to making some legendary memories along the way.
I wish our dear friend the best of luck. He will be missed but we know where his new office is, so we can go drop in on him whenever. He's left but he hasn't escaped.
Until tomorrow inshallah, live & love with kindness.